Ladies, here are the 20 things you should do to keep your man happy

Those little kisses you trail down his neck and chest? He. Loves. It. When you’re in a long term relationship, one of your earnest desires is to make your man happy. When you are able to achieve this, it will be much easier to keep your relationship vibrant and loving. Below are 20 things to choose from on the journey to a happy man and a peaceful home.

1. The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach:  We’re not asking you to be the stereotypical housewife here, but any man (as any woman) loves it when their partner whips up their favorite dish for them.

2. They love kisses: Those little kisses you trail down his neck and chest? He. Loves. It.

3. Nagging: Women are generally more expressive than men, but that doesn’t mean we’re entitled to moan and b*tch all the time! Quit nagging him for unnecessary things or you’ll push him away.

4. “I’m Bloated”: We’re all about being open here, but some things you should keep to yourself. He doesn’t want to know about it. OK?

5. Dressing up: Don’t bother asking your man if he likes what you’re wearing. Firstly, they never know what the right answer is and secondly, he’s always going to say yes (unless he wants a war)!

6. Have self-respect: A bit of self-dignity and self-confidence in who you are and what you want is HOT. If you can’t respect yourself, he won’t respect you.

7. Don’t act crazy: A combination of paranoia, selfishness, and impatience can make a woman act in strange psychotic ways. Don’t be the psycho GF.

8. Don’t be weak: When things get tough try to be emotionally strong. Sure, your man wants to take care of you and support you, but not to the point that he’s nothing but a babysitter! Besides, when you do get upset he’ll take you A LOT more seriously if you’re not crying all time.

9. Be natural: Men like it when girls doll up, but believe it or not, they love it even more when you’re natural. Makeup free and carefree – that’s when you’re most beautiful.

10. Sleeping on his chest: Men love it when they feel like they’re protecting you. And believe it or not, they do like a spoon!

11. Threesomes: Yes, men will think about having a threesome with you and another woman, but they don’t expect you to act upon it. It’s a fantasy – chill out.

12. Other girls… Not always, but sometimes, men will picture other girls when they think about or have sex. Again, it’s a male thing. Don’t take it too seriously.

13. PornHub, RedTube – all men watch porn!  Expect an average of three to four times a week. When he’s busy or in a relationship it might be as little as once a week. Why? For a quickie! All men have needs.

14. Men love fantasy films: Most men secretly like Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, and Game of Thrones. You must have a working knowledge of Luke Skywalker, Frodo, and Daenerys Targaryen. Deal with it.

15. Surprise him with lingerie: Make sure to buy some sexy lingerie from time to time. Whether it’s a babydoll, garter slip, teddy, or new two-piece it’s gonna drive him CRAZY.

16. His mom comes first: Sorry ladies – you can’t always be the #1 woman in his life. She carried him, gave birth to him, and raised the man – there’s no competition here. Instead of acting like she’s your worst enemy try to make an effort with her. Your man will notice.

17. The off-side rule: Learn it. No questions asked.

18. Men are clueless when it comes to periods: Don’t expect your man to know what type of pill you’re taking or whether your menstrual cycle is ‘normal’. It’s all foreign to him so if he’s acting like what you’re saying isn’t a big deal it’s because most of the time he doesn’t really know what you’re on about. So much that…

19. They don’t mind having sex with you while you’re on: Yup, most guys don’t really care if you’re on TOM as long as they get the goods. Failing that, ”red day is the head day”, right?

20. You’re always leaving the toilet seat down: Men put up the toilet seat. End of. If you find the seat up, get over it and put it down. It’s not worth fighting over.

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